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Dear Ms. Launders,
is it a bad idea to use some alcohol as 'aid' in my first date with Jane? Although she expressed lesbian desire towards me, she also stated this might be her first lesbian sex experience and I would hate to ruin it for her... -Lesbo Lush
Lesbo Lush,
you'd hate to ruin it for her, so your plan is to get her wasted so that she can't make a rational decision, nor will she remember what happened. That way, she will wake up feeling used and like she was "tricked" into being lesbian. Great move, dumb cunt!
And why would this be necessary? She wants you, you want her, and she is young and willing. Are you that scared and nervous that you would want to ply your date with alcohol so that she will do whatever you want? Why not just cross the border, go to Tijuana, and pick up some date-rape-drugs and put them in her drink, and you will be guaranteed success?
Part of life, dating, falling in love, having sex, is dealing with the possibility of rejection. And you seem so scared shitless that this little lesbian hottie might reject you that you are willing to take away her ability to choose for herself. If your self esteem is that low, why don't you just hire a prostitute, or find a young co-ed and offer her some financial assistance for some pussy licking.
Now, this is completely different from having a glass of wine with dinner, or meeting for a drink. Alcohol has always been used as a "social lubricant" and it allows people to relax in awkward situations. There is a reason why we associate wine with romance and tequila shots with parties. But this is different than a pre-meditated plan to give your date alcohol.
If you are this insecure, and she is so young, and you are this much of a jerk, I advise you to cancel the date until you can get the help that you need. Now, for all you other readers, some Lesbo Launders tips on putting your young lesbian lover in the mood, beyond the obvious (candles, soft music, DUHH!):
Read aloud poetry. I suggest that you don't actually read anything you wrote until you get to know the person: it might seem like you are getting intimate too fast if you read really personal stuff on the first date. Also, if she doesn't like your style, it could actually become a turn off. Look at the stars. It's free, it's romantic, it works! If you live in the city, replace stars with skyline.
Start off with the opposite of what you would normally do-invite her to touch you first, so that she can get over her fears. Let her touch your feet and legs, which while sensual, is not as intimidating as starting with breasts or the stomach. Then do the same with her. Let her feel like she is in control. Slow dance. Two women dancing together is acceptable just about everywhere, people will just think you are two friends. And don't forget to switch off leading! Cook a meal together. It gives you a common goal, takes your mind off the tension, and then you get to eat it together. Make sure to include some whipped cream and fruit for desert! -Lesbo Launders
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