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Dear LL,
I am totally into girls eating girls but not so much the more extreme behaviour. My friend recently asked me about fisting and I am not sure if I want to do this. Is it dangerous? Girl eater, Czech Republic.-
Dear Girl eater,
Deciding whether or not you want to participate in "extreme" behaviour, as you call it, is not so much a question of setting limits but experimenting and seeing if you like it or not. There has been a major shift in sexual experience over the past few decades, which has only been intensified due to the internet and growth of the porn industry: acts that used to be considered to be "extreme" are now part of many "normal" peoples sexual repertoire. This does not mean that you should do every sexual act known to humankind, but it does mean that you should constantly think about what new things you want to try. You never know what you like and dont like until you try it.
Lesbo Launders herself used to hate having a dildo inserted into her ass, and was sure that it was something "extreme" that didnt interest her, until I met the right girl who knew what she was doing and showed me how pleasurable it could be! And she was the right girl to try it with: a mature lesbian woman, experienced and willing to take it slow. If you can find a girl like this, you should reconsider your "extreme behaviour" ban.
Now, on to fisting in particular: Your vagina can withhold a seven pound baby pushing its way through (ewww! Gross!). It can handle a fist. Easily! If you are turned on and it is done right, it can be an intense, but pleasurable, experience.
First, fisting should be done only when you are really turned on and relaxed. Spend at least an hour kissing and touching each others bodies, and then a lot of time on pussy licking. Make sure that that pussy gets nice and wet. Even then, take some extra lube and rube it over your hand before inserting. The most intense experience is the actual insertion of the fist into the vaginal canal. Once the hand is actually inside you, you will feel debilitating strong waves of pleasure wash over your entire body. Your breath will become more shallow, your vision blurred, and you will feel like you are on another planet. Not just because you have a fist inside of you, but because you are sharing something very intense with another girl.
Most girls who like fisting do not practice it everyday—rather, as the wise lesbian says in Kevin Smiths movie Chasing Amy—it is for very special occasions. (I highly recommend you watch probably the only mainstream movie that talks about fisting and how to do it! Added bonus, very funny movie.) I think a lot of people are frightened to try new sex acts because they are afraid that if they lose their "extreme behaviour virginity" they will have to always perform that act every time they are intimate with someone. Not true! Experimentation can be a one time deal or it can lead to more experimentation. The base of a healthy and open sexuality is not only listening to your partner but listening to yourself. And remember, as you grow, you sexual tastes change. Yummy!
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